MIM Ezine, December 29, 2010

-- Book Review, "Leading on Empty: Refilling Your Tank and Refilling Your Passion", by Wayne Cordeiro, reviewed by Teena Stewart.

We wish the hug of a bear and the kiss of an angel to Teena Stewart who is moving on to other adventures. Teena launched Ministry in Motion in 2000 to answer God’s call to help equip leadership for effective ministry. In the last few years Teena and her husband, Jeff, have moved across country to Hickory, North Carolina to launch a new Christian coffee house ministry called Java Journey. You can check out their progress at www.javajourney.org.

Tom and Dennis joined Ministry in Motion in 2006 and have partnered with Teena in all aspects of the ministry. Along with Associate Editor Karen Patterson, our passion for effective ministry leadership will continue in the publication of the ezine twice each month.

We will miss Teena’s energy and insights. She is truly a ministry entrepreneur. Teena will continue to write for the ezine, and we will continue to promote Teena’s books. She has another one to be released soon.

The arrival of the new year brings an end to the contributions of Charles Marshall. We have been informed that he is discontinuing his writing to focus on his opportunities for public speaking. We will miss his humorous insights.

If you have questions or concerns about MIM, let us know. If you are blessed by what you see, let your friends know. We continue to look for guest columnists and book reviewers. Please read the guidelines before submitting samples.

In Matthew 18:12-14, Jesus told the story of the shepherd leaving the 99 sheep safe in the sheep fold in order to go in search for one lost sheep. This past weekend I had the opportunity to observe the fulfillment of this parable first hand.

A local group called Restoration Ministries has established relationships with several women from a few of the men’s clubs in the seedier parts of town. These women provide adult entertainment for men through exotic dancing and stripping. Surprisingly, the group received permission from the owners of these clubs to come in one-on-one and connect with these women. For at least six months they have been showing up to present them with gifts and to get to know them. On Valentine’s Day they brought large heart shaped candy boxes filled with chocolate. On other occasions they brought something different. Little by little they got to know the girls.

Eventually, the group felt that it was time to throw a party for these women with the hopes of making them feel loved and pampered, and in the process build stronger bridges with them. The eventual hope was that they would be able to lead them to make a commitment to Christ. When they approached Java Journey, our coffee shop ministry, about using our facility for this purpose, we were delighted to be able to come along-side them and provide the location and the support to make this happen. Their mission and ours are very similar, to reach the lost for Christ. We’d provide the space, atmosphere and counter help (all female, of course). They would do all the rest.

I arrived for my shift to find the place elaborately decorated. It looked as if we were set up for a wedding reception. Attractive balloon bouquets were scattered around the room. One of the women was a professional chef and she had set up a table with chafing dishes, and elegant food. Hurricane candles topped off the setting. Several large gift baskets lined the wall and next to them multiple, pink gift bags frothed with pink tissue paper and were filled with makeup and hair care products for the guests.

I had to walk through a cluster of women, many of them still dressed in their Sunday finest, to get behind the counter. All were wearing name tags. I couldn’t help but wonder how comfortable the dancers would feel if and when they made an appearance. They were sure to be outnumbered.

Time ticked away, and several women peered out the door, scanning the parking lot for the intended guests. Several others sat together at a registration table. Women clustered about chatting and talking. More time passed….still no club dancers. It had the feel of a wedding reception where the bride and groom were late far past their expected time of arrival. Finally, one club dancer entered. All eyes turned toward her. She was dressed casually in a knit, shorts jump suit and was rather plain looking. A twenty-something young lady with frizzy long hair, a rough complexion and crooked teeth. How must she have felt having to pass through all the finery to take a seat at the table they offered?

I wasn’t privy to the conversation. She was treated to a facial, and later face painting; yes, they had a face painter there. And she was offered refreshments. No one witnessed to her. They just talked and chatted. Toward the end of her stay, she came up to the counter and ordered a smoothie with the free coupon she had been given. By then her boyfriend had arrived to pick her up. The women encouraged him to come in and order a free drink as well. It was clear from the young couple’s reaction they had never been treated to such a beverage and they were a little unsure of themselves, but smiled happily as we handed them their drinks.

And that, as they say, was that. There were no lightening flashes of someone being stricken with the sudden realization of their sinfulness. No one committed themselves to Christ. And disappointment showed on some of the worker’s faces. The group had not been sure how it would go, but had expected between four and seven women. Instead, they got just one.

I told Beth, their leader not to be discouraged. That it was all good. Beth looked at me and said philosophically, “Well, it’s Biblical. Jesus talked about the one lost sheep. I believe in my heart God is working on her. She may go back and tell others…who knows what can happen. It’s a start.”

Beth is right. Jesus never meant for our outreach to be about volume. It’s about relationships which are built one at a time. Lost people don’t usually come to us. We must seek them out. What a brave effort on the part of these women to take such measures to make these connections. Though it may not make a difference to hundreds, it will make a difference to the one. Isn’t that what it’s all about?

Teena Stewart and her husband, Jeff, operate Java Journey a Christian coffee shop ministry (http://www.javajourney.org.) She is a published author, ministry consultant, and speaker. Her most recent book is Successful Small Groups from Concept to Practice. For more info about Teena see http://www.ministryinmotion.net/teena_stewart.html or http://www.serendipitini.com. You are welcome to email her with questions or comments at smartwords@embarqmail.

We’d come through a miserable, hot and dry summer here in North Carolina, hotter than I could remember. I always keep a garden, but this year, partly due to my neglect due to over busyness, and partly because of lack of rain, it produced very little. No overabundance this year…No dehydrating or freezing. Only a few tomato plants survived, producing stunted pint-size fruits. The foliage and grass at the end of the summer was brittle and dry. Brown leaves fell from the tree in front of my house, not because it was entering the fall season as much as because the tree lacked the stamina to grasp them any longer. On my evening walk dark clouds gathered in the sky, but they taunted and teased, refusing to release their moisture.

The physical world mirrored my spiritual condition. I felt dried up, parched and exhausted. It had been a disheartening week for several reasons. I work full-time at a women’s rescue mission, not so much out of noble cause, but because of necessity. You see, I am the bread winner at my house, having to support my husband and me both as he works long, unpaid hours in our coffee shop ministry start up. On a good day, it can be one of the most rewarding jobs imaginable. But on a bad day…it can feel like being the victim of a multi-car pile up ... and yours was the one car that was flattened so badly that even Jaws of Life couldn’t get you out.

Ministry at work and ministry in the coffee shop seem to run an eerie parallel as we try to make progress on both fronts but see little results. The residents we work with in my day job all seem hell bent on making stupid choices. Even the ones who graduated the program are falling into the ditch. Actually, not falling, more like swan-diving by choice. After a particularly disheartening day in which we had to ask two residents, who had seemed to be making progress to leave the program, the program supervisor came up to me and poured out her heart. “I can’t remember a time when I have felt more discouraged. Honestly,” she said, eyes shining with unshed tears, “I find myself wondering, ‘what difference does it make?’ I mean, here we are pouring our lives out on these women and we think we’re making progress only to see them throw themselves under the bus. Sometimes I think I’d make just as much progress if I didn’t do anything.”

I uttered some weak words of encouragement…trying to find some scrap of hope I could throw her, but I could understand well what she meant. In our coffee shop ministry my husband and I were feeling the same way as we poured ourselves into trying to connect with people for Christ, but wondered if it was making a hill of beans difference from the slim results we were seeing.

I know we are not alone. Ministry is hard. It is probably the hardest thing you will ever do and the sheep we work with act and smell like sheep. One minute it feels like you might actually be having an impact on them and the next minute they’re off in the brambles and thickets going their own way. You may see the cliff they are headed for, but good luck keeping them from walking off of it.

Launching new churches or new ministries in particular can be excruciatingly exhausting and emotionally draining as you work long hours with little or no support and no past experience to guide you in decisions. Sometimes it feels like the age-old game of Chutes and Ladders where you end up back nearly at your starting point. Sometimes if feels like the lost man in the desert, who has no sense of direction and no hope of water to clench his unbearable thirst.

When we are going through such times it seems to last forever. We cry out to a God who tarries when we want Him to rush to our aid; who is silent when we want answers and who seems weak when we want strength. We want a rain shower but instead it feels like He sends blazing hot winds and gritty dust.

Just after defeating the prophets of Baal, Elijah climbed to the top of Mt. Carmel and sought out God. And it says that Elijah bent down to the ground and put his face between his knees. An odd posture, a humble one; one that speaks of physical exhaustion, maybe even despair. Elijah, who had just witnessed an amazing outpouring of God’s power and destruction on the false prophets, needed direction. He was not sure what to do. Had God grown suddenly silent? Elijah sent a servant seven times to look out toward the sea. Finally, on the seventh time (and we are given no indication how long he and his servant had to wait) the servant spied a cloud no bigger than a man’s hand slowly rising. The prophet breathed in the scent of rain. It was coming and with it a renewed sense of direction and refreshment. Suddenly it was clear what God wanted him to do. Elijah sent Ahab on his way to Jezreel and as the rain poured down soaking him through and quenching the famine–parched land, the power of God came upon him. He hitched up his cloak and ran ahead of Ahab to Jezreel. (1 Kings 18:42-46).

The story serves as an encouragement to me. We may feel emotionally and physically exhausted, discouraged and even abandoned by God. We may come to a place where we are walking through a famine-parched land and our tongue cleaves to our mouth. We may feel like giving up. It would be so much easier if we did. But if we will only wait and be faithful, and seek Him, we will see a sign that He is still with us. It may start with something as small as a man’s hand, but if we will only wait it out, soon the horizon will be clouded with dark but promising clouds. And then it comes, sweet, refreshing rain.

Teena Stewart is a published author and artist. She and her husband, Jeff, operate Java Journey a Christian coffee shop ministry (http://www.javajourney.org.) Her most recent book is Successful Small Groups from Concept to Practice. She has also written an ebooklet entitled Dealing with Discouragement (http://www.ministryinmotion.net/MIMBookshop_Books_Christians.html) For more info about Teena visit http://www.serendipitini.com. You are welcome to email her with questions or comments at smartwords@embarqmail.

Book Review: Leading on Empty: Refilling Your Tank and Renewing Your Passion

Strenuous demands placed on pastors who often work long hours and are frequently on call and under the microscope can increase the risk of burnout. Those who are more entrepreneurial, such as church planters, are particularly susceptible. Wayne Cordeiro is a reknown writer, pastor, speaker, and church planter who has planted over 100 churches. The more Cordeiro succeeded, the more demands were put on him by the public and by himself.

One day hours before a speaking engagement in California, Cordeiro went out for a jog and found himself sitting on a curb sobbing uncontrollable. He had no idea what had happened, but after a physical, was advised by his doctor that he had pushed himself beyond physical limits. He had to pull back from his frantic schedule for a while, but as might be expected of a type A personality, it wasn’t long before Cordeiro found himself rushing from one obligation to another. The final straw came when he was diagnosed with pneumonia and was forced to cancel a series of speaking engagements.

Cordeiro spent the time after these defining incidents trying to pull back and regroup. For someone as driven as he is, it wasn’t easy. He took time off and scheduled time away in a monastery away from responsibilities and family. Without cell phone, television, computer or even interaction with others (except for the monks who kept strict silence), he was forced into solitude and reflection. This spiritual respite had life altering effects. When he returned to his pastoral obligations, Cordeiro was advised that burnout of this magnitude would take a lengthy amount of time to recover from and, more importantly, it was unhealthy to continue the pace he had been keeping because it had depleted his reserves.

Having “been there,” Cordeiro advises his readers regarding how to detect when burnout is happening, and what to do to put safe guards in place to prevent it. Much of the advice is based on his own personality and his way of coping. And, for the most part, his advice is applicable to most readers, but at times he assumes that everyone shares similar perceptions, coping mechanisms, personality, or passions.

Some of the best advice he gives, however, is for readers to familiarize themselves with what energizes and drains them. Every leader is subject to specific duties and obligations that come with his/her position, but working to find more of a balance by identifying the drainers and the energizers can keep the leader much healthier.

Cordeiro also cautions against relapse. Just because someone has pulled themselves out of the tailspin, doesn’t mean they won’t find themselves in another death dive at some point. The good news is, once they learn to identify the warning signals that they are falling back into old destructive habits, they are better able to circumvent potential disastrous results by altering behavior, thereby avoiding a crash. Taking periodic sabbaticals are also key elements to preventing burn-out.

Cordeiro is a gifted writer and speaker, and his down to earth style makes his books enjoyable and easily adaptable. His honesty about his experience is refreshing since the tendency among big name pastors is to hide their struggles. If it can happen to someone this accomplished who seems so together, then it can happen to any leader. Anyone in a leadership role in the church would be wise to heed his advice and learn how to continue in ministry while setting healthy boundaries.

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Ministry in Motion is looking for columnists and writers in the following areas: women's ministry, men's ministry, single's ministry, youth ministry, worship ministry, small group/bible study ministry, and general ministry. We are also open to general church ministry related freelance articles. If you have an idea for a column or would like to share ministry insight or even short ministry tips, we'd love to hear from you. Present payment is promotion only -- no pay but great exposure for you, your ministry, book, or website. Please read our writer's guidelines here.

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DBMIM December 29, 2010